Timing is everything.

The group of church friends are so wonderful to host a kind of 'going away' party for me. It was so great to hang out with them. They even invited me to hang out tomorrow and offerred to help on friday. I like them all so much, so much that I am like 'arrrrrr why now that I am moving!? Why didn't they want to hang out more often while I was still going to be here!?" Shortly after beginning to think about this and get almost frusterated at the timing (whether by accident or on purpose) of it, I realized that if they HAD wanted to hang out more often before I was leaving and we HAD been better friends....I wouldn't have been able to leave. I think that God's timing in everything is perfect. As much as I am angry, frusterated, sad (a whole gamut of emotions) I think that God knows me, and he knows that I couldn't have anything major going on that would keep me here. He really really is pushing me into moving. It is so obviously and clearly his plan for me, so it makes sense that he would make the path as clear as possible for me to let go and just do it. Its kind of the same thing as with my mom. Its like I needed my relationship with my mom to change and for us to be less close because otherwise I couldn't leave her. EVERYTHING in the past 6 months (probably quite longer, but thats how long I've noticed it for) has lead upto this. It was back in August that God told me I would be moving to this place. I lost faith and thought it wasn't going to happen, but he has made it happen! Who am I for God to work in my life!? I feel so blessed that he cares, so blessed that he has a plan to use me. Seriously, like who am I to deserve anything from God? Amazing.

I really love you girls: Leah, Sarah, Olivia, Whitney! (Debbi too). you are so freaking sweet to care about me at all. I feel totally blessed to have spent time with you and I feel honored that I was even on your radar.You rock my face off!

so the lesson is that God's timing is perfect. And he does all things according to his plan, especially when we submit ourselves to it. I am so excited thinking of all the things God is going to teach me. I really want to minister to people and be loving to them. I just can't wait to grow more in God and become a better servant! this whole change of life is scary, Im giving up everything ive known, im getting out of my comfort zone, letting go of my routine, and just starting new. At least I have comfort in knowing that this is what God wants. AHHHHHHH a little bit, but I am sure it will be great!